the law of love

I’ve got my heart broken so many times i’ve stopped keeping track. I am a person who always tries to see good in people, someone who always wants to believe that there is more good than bad and let me tell you something, only when i learned that you can’t change certain things or can’t affect certain things and how others act is when i realized that just because they have broken your heart it doesn’t mean that they are a bad person.

We live in a generation where we hide our feelings, we all try to be as cold as possible so we don’t get hurt. But is it worth it? Is it worth living a life without love just because we are scared of what might happen?

But first what does this word “love” mean? No it’s not just posting couple pictures on social media, it’s not just having eachother names in Instagram bio.

It’s the feeling of comfort and security. It’s knowing you have someone who makes you feel so happy that no matter what happens you feel at peace because you have that one person.

It’s screaming and fighting, fighting for the love, fighting to solve the problem because throwing away what you have is not an option.

It’s falling asleep in eachothers arms, it’s waking up and starting your day with a kiss. It’s dancing together, it’s making eachother laugh.

It’s motivating eachother to build a life that’s gonna make you happy induvidually but also as a couple. It’s believing in one another to make your dreams come true.

It’s having the mutual support. It’s compromising about certain things, it’s trusting.

It’s building a life together, it’s spending time together but also giving eachother space.

It’s two individual lifes that match together.

It is so hard to find something like that nowdays, don’t ask me why. I guess people are satisfied with one night with different people instead of every night with the same person.

I guess people don’t value the secrecy of love anymore. We hurt other people so we don’t get hurt, we push away others so we wouldn’t be pushed away. We don’t take risks anymore, we don’t fight for something when we want it anymore.

And no you don’t necessarily need another person to feel complete and live a happy life, your happiness depends only on you. But i’ve been single now for 3 years and i have built my life completely alone, i’ve done things alone, i’ve learned how to enjoy my company, i have learned so much about myself but let me tell you something i do miss having someone who’s gonna hold me after a long bad day.

I do miss having a comfort of knowing that there is someone out there who’s gonna care about me and who’s gonna accept me with all my flaws and insecurities.

It’s not about finding a perfect person, it’s about accepting someones soul, it’s realizing that they are gonna have bad days, that it’s not always gonna be rainbows and butterflies, that it’s not always gonna be 50-50 that sometimes it’s gonna be 80-20 but that it’s worth fighting for it.

And yes even i do lately crave love i am not settling for anything less that i deserve and nor should any woman or man do that.

Figure yourself out first, learn about yourself first, be alone for some time and love will find you, it will match you with someone who fits you like a glove.

And then my dear the magic is going to happen.

A dream.

Did you ever have a dream that seemed so real? The feeling, the touch, the view. You know the feeling like you just want to stay there forever. For a half of a second it becomes your reality and you feel peace.

I had a dream like that last night, i can‘t really write what was it about but it hit me so hard and there was one moment that just keeps flashing in my mind because it seemed so real. It was about someone i loved and it made me miss them even more.

I remember i was always fascinated by dreams like how mind remembers all the faces and stigmas even when we‘re asleep like how your brain exactly knows who‘s face your heart wants to see. It doesn‘t matter if that‘s someone who died, or someone whom we lost or just someone we‘re longing to see.

It‘s a beautiful thing that our brain lets us have this one moment with a person, that no one else knows, no one else can take that away from you because it‘s not real.

Last night i had a dream that kinda affects my whole day now and i needed to write about it.

You know the song from Cindarella „ A dream is a wish your heart makes „ and i really do believe in that.

But do we easily confuse reality and dreams? I think so. Probably, it‘s unhealthy to believe in something you‘ve dreamt. I needed couple of minutes to snap out of it, we could easily be fooled by whats real and what we wish was real.

 

„Everybody said – follow your heart – i did. It got broken „